september already...

it amazes me how fast the days are going. i cannot believe it is september already. life is blissful. work is just great! i work with some amazing people. i laugh everyday at work- without fail. & i come home & laugh with mike. we giggle & we love eachother so much! when i was moving out back in january- i threw away a framed thing i had made of our 1st anniversary pics...i had an owl sitting on a one. my plan was to put up a pic on the wall of each anniversary. for some reason we didnt get around to getting our second anniversary pics done. but anyways....i threw that framed scrapbook art thing away in the trash outside. Well...tonight- while cleaning the front room- i found it. mike had gone & pulled it out of the trash when i left. he went to bed early(his back is hurtin bad)& gave him a big hug & kiss....i'm so glad he kept it.

anywho...life is good. work is good. stress level is good.

sorry i haven't posted in so long. with work, mike, pinterest, & facebook...i just forget to post here!

oh one last thing- we have been reading this great book called- Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson. it is really good & really interesting. it has questions at the end of the chapters n stuff. I think couples would enjoy reading it. really...even if things are fabulous...its still a good book :)

i choose to be happy.

i just want to share some randomness

every day, passion speaks to us through our feelings. that's why when you allow yourself to become anesthetized by what others think, you literally block yourself from living the life you were called to live.
I promise you that if you make a choice that doesn't please your mate, your friends, your mother, or whoever, the world will not fall apart -- the people who truly love you want you to love yourself. and as you become clearer about who you really are, you'll be better able to decide what is best for you -- the first time around.
Oprah Winfrey


sometimes life takes twists and turns, teaches you lessons you never wanted to learn, pushes you down, picks you up, shows you how much you can handle, and how much you can't, sometimes your heart breaks & then it heals and allows you to love more than you thought possible.
i am in a spot where i am happy. i love my life.

moving forward with mike by my side.

love you all & thank you all for your kind words & prayers & huge hearts.

a month?

Sorry its been so long since i've posted!

just thought i'd update.

a lady in Prescott owns a boutique called the Queen Bee Boutique- & ordered 11 onesies/clips from me! She has them hung up on a clothesline & it looks super cute! can't wait till they sell out!

My co-workers parents live in bisbee & her mom helps out @ a little store & i'm doing consignment with some onesies for them... i did vinyl onesies- cowboy boots, az baby, and yeehaw ones! they turned out pretty cute! (thank you traci for helping me design them on the computer!!)

I also sold that vintage/anthropology necklace holder i made a while back- to a teacher at the school i work at! for $45! Pretty excited about that! Prices vary with them- anthro knobs are NOT cheap.

anyways... i've done some orders here and there & its kept me busy. always something to be done!

life is moving right along. i am going to register for school for Fall semester! not super excited- but such is life.
I plan to work full time & go to school full time come august! wish me luck with that!! haha.

I also did a class with Emily Falconbridge last month- a wet felting class! it is HARD work ! It was great meeting her & learning something new & meeting new people! THANK you jill! :)

i'll try & posts pics of the onesies & felting stuff soon!

toodles.

this is my year.

when i first saw this (the above picture) i thought, ya right- this is NOT my year. But then, i re-thought it. i contemplated, & then i realized that this IS my year. ya, of course it started out rough... but i will be stronger. i will be happier. i will be wiser. i will be rebuilt. i will make my mark. i will be smarter. i will be one step closer to finding who i am. i will become who i am supposed to be. i will be found. this is the year that i will always remember as a defining time in my life. when i was literally in the depths of despair. and then i realized....

my health depends on my happiness. i can't go on without a smile on my face. i choose happiness. i hate change. if anyone knows me at all- they know that. i crave consistency. i crave it. i get anxiety when life takes a different direction. i like knowing whats gonna happen before it happens. i need to loosen up. i need to let go. i choose happiness- because it is good for my health.

I believe in myself. i know that if i can get through this- i can get through anything. i can go back to school. i can find a career path that fits me. i can do it. i can try and try again. i am not a failure. i will be better. i will find the path i am supposed to be on. i believe i can- and i will.

p.s. papers were filed today. 3.23.11. appx 60 days from now...its all final. that will be one of "those" days.  then i will begin life as Mindy Riggs- the end of a hard road, and a new beginning of possibilities.

side note: pinterest.com is great. i searched 'words'. and thats where i get all these fantastic artsy sayings. 

be your own hero.

"Strength and resilience emerge by your own will to become a better person no matter what downfalls happen in your life...be your own hero."

i'm pretty sure anyone on facebook is sick of my quotes and photo quotes. then anyone who comes to my blog gets a page full of quotes too.

i dont have a way with words, and its easier to use others quotes to describe exactly how i feel. 

each step in this "process" has its heart wrenching moments.and when i thought i wouldn't break down, the next step comes and i crumble.  but i have to remind myself daily- that at the end of everyday, i made it through & tomorrow will be better. my strength to keep going is not my strength alone. i have so many people rooting me on. i know that i will be stronger. 

on a lighter note- its spring break, and i started it off with a pampering spa day with my sisters Traci & amy & our friend Jenna. MUCH needed & deserved...>I< think. it started with shopping at Scottsdale Fashion- went to H&M for the first time! Then we headed to get a facial & massage. (i need to go regularly for a massage. maybe at SWI-HA.) 

ended the night at dinner & then had ice cream with our Sprinkles cupcakes- also my first time! amazing.

i'm going to leave you with my favorite quote pic of the day:

strength unknown

I know to anyone who has been through this- there isnt anything anyone can say that "makes it all better", these wounds take time to heal. you have to find strength within yourself to find peace in the adversity & find a place in your heart to heal. it keeps playing in my mind (maybe you find it odd, but its very real to me), a peace sign; that has been shattered and broken- and then pieced back together. it surely didn't happen overnight. it happened because i let it. slowly.
 everyone has trials. everyone has these heart wrenching experiences. everyone has a choice. we can choose to be hurt. we can choose to be angry. we can choose to be sad. i believe that those are steps we have to go through in the healing process. but part of it is embracing the hardship, and letting it make us stronger. i choose to be stronger. i cannot let this experience drag me down. yes, every step will have its moments of sadness- but there will be a time when i can look back and realize i made the best of what i was dealt.
Ecclesiastes 3: "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven....
a time to break down, and a time to build up....A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;"

Joseph B Worthlin said:
“Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays. "

“But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come. “No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, in this life or the next, Sunday will come."

 

he also said "Every life has peaks and shadows and times when it seems that the birds don't sing and bells don't ring. Yet in spite of discouragement and adversity, those who are happiest seem to have a way of learning from difficult times, becoming stronger, wiser, and happier as a result."

“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together
when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true
strength.”You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you
really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived
through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." . . . You must
do the thing you think you cannot do.
Eleanor Roosevelt
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to
pick one of those pieces up and begin again.  ~Flavia
 I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders.  ~Jewish Proverb
"The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter."
"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead
and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat.  I'm all ready you see.Now my troubles are going to have trouble with me!~Dr. Seuss
p.s. this is my journal. these are my feelings & the quotes that help in my healing.

breathe

i never thought at age 22 i could go through so much. 
i never thought i could feel so many deep emotions.
i never thought i would be going through a divorce.
i never thought i would feel this way, its too hard to describe.
i never thought i could get through this. 


3-4 weeks ago, i didnt think i would get through this. & honestly felt God was giving me something i COULDNT handle. 


i never thought i'd ever want so badly to be 5 again.
i never thought i'd feel so much hurt. so much pain. so much heartache.
i never thought i'd get to this point of feeling again that "God won't give me anything i can't handle"- (i just wish he didnt trust me so much) i'm a believer now. if you asked me 3 weeks ago- i questioned it.


thank you family. thank you friends. for kind words. for not judging. for being good listeners. 

quote by president  DIETER F. UCHTDORF:
"It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.

There are those among you who, although young, have already suffered a full measure of grief and sorrow. My heart is filled with compassion and love for you. How dear you are to the Church. How beloved you are of your Heavenly Father. Though it may seem that you are alone, angels attend you. Though you may feel that no one can understand the depth of your despair, our Savior, Jesus Christ, understands. He suffered more than we can possibly imagine, and He did it for us; He did it for you. You are not alone."

If you ever feel your burden is too great to bear, lift your heart to your Heavenly Father, and He will uphold and bless you. He says to you, as He said to Joseph Smith, “[Your] adversity and [your] afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then, if [you] endure it well, God shall exalt [you] on high.” 

“Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself... 'How did I get through all of that?


Hope is the feeling we have- that the feeling we have is not permanent.  ~Mignon McLaughlin


“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...” ralph waldo emerson







my word for the year has changed... it is now BREATHE. just  breathe. breathe. breathe.