strength unknown

I know to anyone who has been through this- there isnt anything anyone can say that "makes it all better", these wounds take time to heal. you have to find strength within yourself to find peace in the adversity & find a place in your heart to heal. it keeps playing in my mind (maybe you find it odd, but its very real to me), a peace sign; that has been shattered and broken- and then pieced back together. it surely didn't happen overnight. it happened because i let it. slowly.
 everyone has trials. everyone has these heart wrenching experiences. everyone has a choice. we can choose to be hurt. we can choose to be angry. we can choose to be sad. i believe that those are steps we have to go through in the healing process. but part of it is embracing the hardship, and letting it make us stronger. i choose to be stronger. i cannot let this experience drag me down. yes, every step will have its moments of sadness- but there will be a time when i can look back and realize i made the best of what i was dealt.
Ecclesiastes 3: "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven....
a time to break down, and a time to build up....A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;"

Joseph B Worthlin said:
“Each of us will have our own Fridays—those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We all will experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays. "

“But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death—Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come. “No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, in this life or the next, Sunday will come."

 

he also said "Every life has peaks and shadows and times when it seems that the birds don't sing and bells don't ring. Yet in spite of discouragement and adversity, those who are happiest seem to have a way of learning from difficult times, becoming stronger, wiser, and happier as a result."

“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together
when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true
strength.”You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you
really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived
through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." . . . You must
do the thing you think you cannot do.
Eleanor Roosevelt
If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to
pick one of those pieces up and begin again.  ~Flavia
 I ask not for a lighter burden, but for broader shoulders.  ~Jewish Proverb
"The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter."
"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead
and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat.  I'm all ready you see.Now my troubles are going to have trouble with me!~Dr. Seuss
p.s. this is my journal. these are my feelings & the quotes that help in my healing.

breathe

i never thought at age 22 i could go through so much. 
i never thought i could feel so many deep emotions.
i never thought i would be going through a divorce.
i never thought i would feel this way, its too hard to describe.
i never thought i could get through this. 


3-4 weeks ago, i didnt think i would get through this. & honestly felt God was giving me something i COULDNT handle. 


i never thought i'd ever want so badly to be 5 again.
i never thought i'd feel so much hurt. so much pain. so much heartache.
i never thought i'd get to this point of feeling again that "God won't give me anything i can't handle"- (i just wish he didnt trust me so much) i'm a believer now. if you asked me 3 weeks ago- i questioned it.


thank you family. thank you friends. for kind words. for not judging. for being good listeners. 

quote by president  DIETER F. UCHTDORF:
"It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.

There are those among you who, although young, have already suffered a full measure of grief and sorrow. My heart is filled with compassion and love for you. How dear you are to the Church. How beloved you are of your Heavenly Father. Though it may seem that you are alone, angels attend you. Though you may feel that no one can understand the depth of your despair, our Savior, Jesus Christ, understands. He suffered more than we can possibly imagine, and He did it for us; He did it for you. You are not alone."

If you ever feel your burden is too great to bear, lift your heart to your Heavenly Father, and He will uphold and bless you. He says to you, as He said to Joseph Smith, “[Your] adversity and [your] afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then, if [you] endure it well, God shall exalt [you] on high.” 

“Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself... 'How did I get through all of that?


Hope is the feeling we have- that the feeling we have is not permanent.  ~Mignon McLaughlin


“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...” ralph waldo emerson







my word for the year has changed... it is now BREATHE. just  breathe. breathe. breathe.

quotes

sabrina ward harrison said:
life is messy. trust the mess and the not knowing... this is the real part. the most interesting part.
-now i carry with me every fresh new start, and every final drive away. i dont carry the worry of your departure. i dont carry your number any more or your schedule in my mind. i carry the desire to go unnoticed at the same time not to be forgotten.-i carry the laughter. ...... i carry the dream of you before i knew you and into the days to come. i want to believe there is a bigger plan and a need that is above me for my life. a way that i can trust my deicisions and the way it seems to go.-she quotes may sarton "immitate the trees" let go. cut off excess. prune. wait. watch. grow deep.
in the SWH journal... 6 years ago i wrote "today i carry- a longing to let go + not be scared of the facts"sabrina said "i dont know if i will ever understand this ache, perhaps it is simply + completely love and what happens at the end."listening to "keep breathing" by ingrid michaelson...such a beautiful song.

The future is not some place we are going, but one we are creating. The paths to it are not found but made, and the activity of making them changes both the maker and the destination.
-John Schaar



Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions.
-Rainer Maria Rilke



We know finite disappointment, but we know infinite hope.
-Martin Luther King, Jr.i love this song....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hipzbDMeXs

embrace

you better believe it. this is my word for {2011}.

EMBRACE

i gotta stop stressing about little things.
i quit my part time after-work job, doing respite one day a week.
now i am just working full time still at houston elementary.
now i can focus a little more on my blueyedesign business.

i have done a total of {12} big (23.5 in tall) letters in the last 4 weeks. crazy. i hadn't added them all up til just now! haha.

i am actually doing 3 of them tonight (finishing them anyways) 7 of the 12 are for the secretary at school! she gives me a lot of business. pretty great!

i still love owls & got 6 owl things for christmas :) none from the hubs. i think he thinks my owl fettish is nutso! :)

so i want to start getting headbands up on my etsy site. its long overdue! but my full time job is quite tiring- therefor... when i get off- i dont feel like doing much! but my goal in the next month is to get a bunch of headbands up! (someone hold me to it please??)

i want to EMBRACE doing the things i love when i have time to do them! i love selling my stuff and seeing people happy & wearing them. its fun because i've sold SO many hair things at work in the last year & i see someone wearing a flower or headband or something DAILY! its fun.

i want to EMBRACE house cleaning & laundry...etc. yeah embrace it. its life.

i want to EMBRACE eating healthier & cooking more meals for the hubbs!

i want to EMBRACE life. love. crafting. sewing. cooking. cleaning. hawk watching. owl thrifting.

what is YOUR word for 2011?

p.s. sorry i havent posted in like 2 mo. man i'm terrible!

Boutique.... SOON

Queen Creek Boutique. & a GIVEAWAY for the boutique... check out all the details & vendors...




http://pecancreekboutique.blogspot.com/



its just TWO weeks away...

i'll be selling Headbands, some bows, taking orders for letters & custom onesies. I'll also be selling christmas boy onesies, & some owl onesies! i'm pretty excited!

Necklace holder

I made this necklace holder (which will eventually hang on my wall) all the knobs are from Anthropology (sale ones) & mike drilled the holes & shortened the back of the knobs for me! :) i LOVE the way it turned out!! & i decided to display my owl necklaces on it...just for a picture.

thanks traci, for being the photographer for my stuff :)

thanks...

i brought all my owls over to tracis & she took pics of all of them for a header i had in mind. & then i found that quote by walt whitman & we put it all together. I love it!!

Thanks traci for taking the picture & putting together the header for me! love it. obviously. i {love} OWLS.

as if you couldn't tell from the last post. haha.